Control
by Ktime
Summary: "...it was worth all the bruises in the world to have that sense of control back, even if it was only temporary." When it all gets to much for Aria, she starts to take the self-defense classes to a whole new level; can her friends save her from her self-destructive ways? Sparia friendship.
1. Chapter 1

Hi guys! So this is my first PLL story, I couldn't quite get this idea out of my head.

Please let me know what you think

* * *

It started off as a means to defend herself.

It ended up being her escape.

She honestly can't remember how it first happened. Why she was at the studio so late after class; (she thinks that maybe she was meant to be meeting Jake).

But as she looks back on it, she realises she just doesn't care. Because it doesn't matter how she got into it. She's just thankful she did. (Well, she was initially)

The first fight she signed up for, she got her ass handed to her (and that's putting it politely). She's fairly certain she didn't land _one_ punch the entire 4 rounds she managed to stay out there. She walked out of that studio completely humiliated and in more pain then she's ever been in her entire life.

Yet she's never felt so alive.

So focused.

So safe.

And that's why Aria went back, that's why she continued to go back.

Because that place became her safe haven (mentally at least).

It became a place where she could escape.

Because even with the punches being thrown at her, and the physical damage she sustained during each fight; it was the safest she'd felt in the last 4 years.

Because when she was in that ring, what you saw was what you got.

Because yes, the person opposite you was trying to hurt you.

But that wasn't a secret.

And that's why she loved it.

Because she could deal with people trying to hurt her. It was the lies and deception that were constantly eating away at her. Because when she knew where the next blow was coming from, she could prepare herself for it, she could make an effort to avoid it.

And that's what 'A' had taken away from her.

Because that darn letter at the end of all those fucking messages had taken away her ability to control anything in her life.

And she needed to get some of that control back.

And these fights gave her that opportunity.

Because out there she was focused.

Out there she wasn't effected by the messages, or the threats.

Out there, 'A' had absolutely **_no_** bearing on what was coming next.

Out there she was in control.

And it was worth all the bruises in the world to have that sense of control back, even if it was only temporary.

* * *

Hiding the bruises became just as much part of the battle as the fights themselves. Luckily enough for Aria, her friends were quite distracted. And rightfully so;

Because Hannah's mum was in jail,

And Emily just had a ghost car driven through her living room;

And Spencer had been rejected by her first choice College.

So they didn't have time to worry about her; but that didn't stop them from noticing Aria's change in behaviour.

Because they were her best friends, of course they would noticed;

"Aria what's with the bruise?" Spencer asked urgently, after the shorter girls' sleave rolled up, revealing a particularly dark bruise on her forearm. The question causing Emily and Hannah to look up from their conversation in concern.

"Oh, um, I tripped up the stair-case last night, stupid I know." She laughed it off, hastily rolling down her sleeve; offering a tight lipped smile.

Her friends could tell she was lying, they didn't need Spencer's IQ to figure that out. But they were distracted,

They were busy.

And they knew from experience that if Aria didn't want them to know something then it would remain a secret.

History had proved that.

So they accepted her lie; because they didn't have time to worry about something that they couldn't change. And Aria tries to pretend that their ignorance doesn't hurt; because she knows if she asked them, they'd be there in a heartbeat.

But she can't do that, she's not that selfish;

Because they've got real issues to deal with.

And she doesn't need any help (that's what she continues to tell herself).

* * *

It's 1am by the time she's staring at the contact list in her phone. She stops briefly over Ezra's name, before continuing up to the person who she knows she's going to end up calling anyway. Because she's done this dance the last three times.

Because as much as she wants to call Ezra, she knows she can't.

Because she can't explain this to him;

She can't deal with the seeing the love and regret in his eyes.

Because he said it once: "You know there isn't anything I wouldn't do for you right?"

And as much as she wants him, she can't handle that right now.

Part of her considered calling Jake, but she knew that that wouldn't end well. He'd force her to stop, and she can't afford to let him take away her control, especially not now.

And that's how she first came to the name at the top of her contact list, a name that she can't actually remember adding.

Because she didn't need an ex-boyfriend, or a love interest, or a family member.

She just needs a friend, an acquaintance.

Someone who she can trust;

Someone who she can convince to keep this between them;

Someone who doesn't quite know her as well as everyone else seems to.

And he answered on the third ring,

"Aria?"

* * *

When his phone rings at 1am he knows there's only two people who would be calling at such an ungodly hour. And considering he was in bed next to Hannah; that only left one option. A week ago he probably would've thrown his phone at the wall. But this was not the first time in the last week he'd been woken up by the incestuous ringing of his mobile.

_To say Caleb was surprised when Aria's name first flashed up on his caller ID would be the understatement of the year. _

_"Aria?" He question with concern into the speaker, skipping over all pleasantries._

_"Caleb?" She asked in surprise (as though she didn't expect him to pick up the phone) "Sorry, I didn't know who else to call."_

_"Aria what's wrong?" He asked getting straight to the point._

_"I was wondering if maybe, you could um, come and get me?" Aria forced out rather reluctantly._

_And that was all it took for Caleb to figure out the secret that Aria had successfully managed to keep from all the girls over last couple of weeks. _

_Because she had no makeup to cover the bruises;_

_Because her hand was too swollen to even hold onto the steering wheel._

_Because she owed him an explanation as to why she had forced him out of the comfort of his home so late at night. _

_She managed to convince him not to tell Hannah (much to his displeasure). Convincing him that it wasn't serious, that it was just a means to vent. But unlike the girls, he wasn't so easily distracted,_

_And he wasn't buying it. _

_He didn't know exactly what she was into._

_But he also knew he couldn't stop her._

_She insisted that she was in control, that it wasn't dangerous. _

_And despite his doubts he agreed to keep her secret, on one condition;_

_That, if and when, things got out of control, or if she ever needed a lift home or someone to help her, that she would call him. _

_Terms to which she reluctantly and silently agreed to. _

* * *

So when his phone rings at 1am he picks it up immediately before sneaking out of Hannah's bed. And the fact that he's leaving his girlfriends bed in the middle of the night to help out her best friend doesn't once strike him as odd. Because he knew if Hannah knew what Aria was involved with, that she'd be doing the exact same thing.

So he did this for Hannah, as well as Aria.

Because there's been so much crap that's been going on with his girlfriend recently; and he hasn't been able to do _anything_ to help her.

But this is something he can do.

Because right now Aria needs someone.

And Hannah is in no emotional state to help her (and apparently neither are any of the others).

So it's up to him;

And he's more than okay with that.

Because he'd do anything for his girlfriend, he's proven that time and time again.

So he's going to be there for Aria come hell or high water;

Because these girls were a package deal; and by helping Aria he was helping Hannah.

And that was something he would always do.

* * *

Sooo... What did you think?

I know it's a little bit of an odd character pairing; but I was trying to go for something a little different.

I'm not sure if I want to keep it going or end it here, I've got a few idea's of where to take it. I wanted to explore Aria's relationship with some of the other characters, but I'm not sure, what do you think?

Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys, thanks for the reviews!**

**Shout out**** to:**

**Lala-Pll-Time, Guest, LAs, Sgdp1261.  
**

**I don't have Beta, so any and all mistake are mine and there probably will be a few.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

The third time Caleb pulls up outside the studio, Aria has what seems to be at least 3 fractured bones in her right hand; and is supporting a far from subtle limp.

"Shit Aria!" He exclaims as he turns the car light on to get a better look.

"You should see the other guy," she replies with a slight smirk, pulling her hand away from his concerned gaze.

"Aria you can't keep doing this!"

"What?" The word comes out forced as she slowly pulls her seatbelt over her abused body.

"You can't keep hurting yourself like this."

And those words stop her thoughts in there track. Because out all the thoughts that have been going through her head over the last few weeks. Self-harm was never one of them.

Because she wasn't there to hurt herself.

Because she didn't kick her own knee in;

She wasn't the one causing herself pain.

She was the one protecting herself;

She was the one trying to take control.

And the cracked bones in right hand prove that; because after two weeks and countless losses, Aria had finally clocked her first win.

Thanks mostly to a right hook, which while quite deprecating to herself, was much more damaging to her opponent.

So yes, she admitted she did cause that injury.

But it was in no way self-harm.

It was self-defence.

It was control.

And that's honestly how she saw it.

"I'm fine" She answered staring straight ahead.

"Aria yo…" He was swiftly cut off by the short brunette next to him.

"I said I'm fine!"

And the problem was, she actually believed it.

* * *

Two weeks had passed since that night in the car. And since then, a lot of things had changed. Hannah's mum had been cleared of all charges.

Emily's shoulder had started to heal, and she was starting to get back in the pool.

And Spencer had been spending time with Ezra sorting out her college applications.

Things were finally start to return to normal (well as normal as possible in Rosewood). Except for Aria. And her friends were starting to notice, really notice.

"Has anyone heard from Aria today? She wasn't in English." Spencer spoke up as soon as Hannah and Emily sat down at the table.

"Can you blame her, I wouldn't want to listen to my ex talk about books everyday!" Hannah answered, tactlessly as ever.

"Hannah!" Emily said slapping her slightly, giving a reproachful look.

"Seriously guys, she's been acting strange for the last two weeks, don't tell me you haven't noticed!" Spencer insisted, trying to get some sort of insight about her shorter friend.

And with that Emily and Hannah just looked at each other. Because yes they noticed, they just assumed that she was dealing with it.

Or that someone else was helping her out.

Because they were busy.

"Look it's Aria, if she needs us she'll tell us, but apart from that, there's nothing we can really do if she doesn't want us too know"

That sat in silence as they let Emily's' words sink in.

"She'll come to us when she's ready."

And they let themselves believe those words; because if they believed anything else, that would make them the most unreliable friends in the world.

And they can't handle that.

None of them can.

* * *

Despite Emily's reassurance, Spencer couldn't shake the feeling that something was seriously wrong with her best friend.

But in all honesty she's been having that feeling for the last few weeks.

She just can't ignore it anymore.

Because she thought it was just a phase.

She thought that Aria was just having relationship issues.

But it's coming up on five weeks.

And Spencer can't ignore it anymore.

She can't ignore the winces.

The bruised knuckles.

And most of all, she can't ignore the fact the smaller girl looks more calm and at peace than she ever has over the last couple of years.

And with everything that's going on, that just doesn't make sense.

Because if there's one thing that these girls don't have, it's control.

Because A has taken that away from them.

And as she looks back on it, she realizes how fucked up that is.

Because in the last 3 years her and her friends have lost all sense of control in their lives.

So much so, that when her best friend begins to exhibit signs of having a sense of being in charge of her decisions, even if it's in the smallest sense,

The only explanation is that something is seriously wrong.

And that's just fucked.

But as she looks back on the last few weeks, she realises that she hasn't received a single text from A, and as far as she knows, neither has Hannah or Emily.

And as thankful as she is, (because Emily and Hannah have been in A's spotlight for the last few weeks, and they deserve a break) she's still scared shit less.

Because the inherit absence of A, can only mean two things;

1. A is buying there time, planning something huge.

Or 2. Aria has been on the receiving end of the threatening messages (and decided to keep it to herself).

Either way her friend needed her, because if A was planning something, they needed to stick together. And if Aria was A's next target she shouldn't have to face it alone.

And Spencer would make sure of that.

* * *

_"There's no need for me to hurt you when you're too busy doing it to yourself. Want to know what your best friend has been up to? See for yourself, 6 Manning Street, tonight 8pm -A"_

The text message Spencer received mere hours after her previous revelations, threw all her logic out the window.

Because it didn't make sense,

Because Aria would never hurt herself.

She just wouldn't.

But that fucking message forced Spencer to question everything (as messages from A always did).

Because as much as she didn't want to believe it,

The thing about A was, they never lied.

And if that's the case, then Spencer can't help but think she's been the worst friend in the world.

Because as vague as the message was, the underlining point was clear.

There was something seriously wrong with her best friend,

And she missed it.

And A clearly didn't.

And god Spencer hates that.

She hates that she was distracted enough to allow an anonymous entity to learn more about her best friend than she knew herself.

She hates that she didn't do something when she first saw it.

She hates that it took that message confirmation for her to finally take action.

And yes it could be a trap.

It could be a ruse.

But that's a risk Spencer's willing to take.

Because despite her actions (or lack thereof), over the last few weeks.

She would do anything for her best friend.

And she's going to prove that.

Like she should've done weeks ago.

* * *

**So what did you think?**

**There will be a lot of Sparia in the next chapter.**

**And I know that Emily's shoulder isn't healed in the show, but I don't really want to have to deal with that in this story. Plus she fell on a rock... a rock doesn't do that kind of damage -_-**

**Please review, it means the world!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey Guys!**

**Sorry for the delay, no excuses, just kinda lazy. (And emotionally recovering from last Tuesdays episode!)**

**Thanks heaps for the reviews on the last chapter, might have picked up some ideas, so if you have any please let me know!**

**I don't have a Beta, so all mistakes are mine and mine alone.**

**If anyone is interested in being a Beta please let me know, that'd be awesome!**

* * *

He can't keep doing this.

Because no matter how hard he tries, he just can't seem to stop her.

No matter what he says, how much he begged, she just wouldn't listen.

Because she was convinced she needed this.

Because she was convinced she was fine.

And despite his best efforts he couldn't convince her otherwise. Because as much as he didn't want to admit it, he didn't know her well enough. In fact, he's fairly certain there's only 3 people who do (four if you include Ezra).

Yet somehow they didn't notice.

And he can't for the life of him figure out why.

Because it's so obvious.

To him at least. And if he's honest with himself, if she hadn't told him, he's not sure he would've noticed either. Because he would've been focused on his girlfriend (like he should be now). But she did tell him, so it's the only thing on his mind.

It's all he can think of.

The bruises, the distance, the limp.

It's so fucking clear to him.

And yet somehow they don't see it.

And god he wishes they did.

Because as much as he wants to keep Aria's trust, he can't keep watching her do this.

Because she needs help, and he can't give it to her.

And he'll be damned if he lets her throw her life away.

Because he's had enough of losing those around him.

And he's damn sure Hannah has to.

So when he spots Spencer walking into the room, from his position in the corner, he's never felt so relieved in his life, because if Spencer is here, then he doesn't have to keep this secret anymore.

Because she can give her the help she needs.

The help he hasn't been able to give her;

Despite his best efforts.

* * *

When Spencer arrived at the designated area, she was surprised to see the multitude of cars in car park. Usually address's supplied to them by A, were dark and isolated. And while this place wasn't exactly the 'Ritz'; it was far from the worst location she's ended up in, over the past years.

As she made her were through the door, everything just felt wrong.

There were cracks in the ceiling and walls.

The studio was lit up by three dim lights hanging from the roof.

It smelt like dirty feet.

It was everything that Aria wasn't.

And Spencer could not for the life of her figure out what the smaller girl would be doing there.

But her question was only answered by more questions, when she saw her friend in the middle of studio.

The girl who was known for her exotic choice of clothing, was wearing a grey tank-top, and a loosely fitting short-shorts.

Her hair was up in a Pony-tail.

And her small feet that were usually donning 3 inch heels, were completely bare.

And all Spencer could think was how out of place her best friend looked.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of what sounded like an extremely old and rusty bell, and she looked up to see Aria swiftly moving into the centre of the ring, coming face to face with a guy who looked like he could be at least 21, and had a build that was very similar to Jake.

And it didn't take a genius to figure out what was about to happen.

And there was no way in hell Spencer was going to let it.

She turned towards the ring, only to be stopped by a hand grasping her arm.

"Spencer!" The voice startled her a little, but she recognised it almost immediately.

"What are you doing here?" She asked him, because despite her high IQ this was something she just couldn't put together.

"How did you know about this?" He shot back.

"Who cares, we need to get her out of there!" She exclaimed, ignoring his question, turning back towards the ring, just in time to watch Aria take a kick to the ribs.

"You can't stop it!"

"Like hell I can't!"

"Spence, trust me!" It was the desperate look in his eyes that caused her to stop. She turned back to the fight in front of her, looking on in surprise as Aria landed several damaging blows to her much larger opponent.

"Okay, Caleb, what the fuck is going on?"

* * *

So he told her everything, and as all the words washed over Spencer, she could only think of one thing;

"She called you?" Her voice sounded utterly heartbroken.

And she couldn't help but wonder when she stopped being the person Aria could turn to.

When she stopped being her confidant?

When she stopped being her best friend?

Because they were team 'Sparia'.

They were always there for each other.

Or so she thought,

Because yes, she's been busy.

But she always has time for Aria.

The shorter girl knows this.

Or at least Spencer thought she did.

Because the very fact that Caleb is the one who's telling the story and not her, is evidence against the contrary.

Because clearly somewhere along the line they lost that something that made them so special.

Because apparently about five weeks ago, her best friend was sitting in the gutter outside this shitty studio, unable to drive because her hand was that fucking swollen.

And she called him.

And with every emotion that's currently running through her body, there's one that the bubbles to the surface.

Jealously.

And she hates herself for that,

Because her best friend is clearly in a lot a trouble.

And all she can think about is the fact then when it came right down to it, she turned to him (she hardly even knows him).

And she knows that's her fault, because she was distracted,

Because even if Aria didn't turn to her, she should've noticed something was wrong.

Correction, she did realise, she should've **done** something about it.

Because that's what best friends do.

But she didn't do anything.

So what the fuck did that make her?

"Spencer, it's not your fault she just didn't wa…."

"Yeah I know," She cut Caleb off quickly, not wanting to hear him try to justify her actions.

"How did you find out about this?" He questioned, both pairs of eyes still thoroughly locked on the fight in front of them.

Spencer simply removed her phone from her pocket and showed him the message, never taking her eyes of her best friend.

She wincing violently as Aria's head snaps backwards from the full force of a well-executed punch.

"We can't just sit here, and watch her get the shit beaten out of her by someone who's twice her size!" She half yells, half begs, as Aria cops a second left hook too the jaw. "They're not even wearing protective gear, is this even legal?"

Caleb pulls her back as her outburst begins to attract the attention of some of the other spectators.

"Spencer you can't stop a fight half way through, trust me I've tried, if it gets too much for her she can tap out." Caleb's attempted words of comfort doing little ease her stress.

"How can you just sit here and do nothing? Oh that's right you've been doing it for the last five weeks! Have you even tried to stop her?" She knew the accusation wasn't fair; but at that point in time she just didn't care.

Because if Caleb was the one she was going to turn to, then shouldn't he be able to stop her from doing something so stupid. If he was **so** special, and **so** important, then shouldn't he have been able to help her.

"You think I haven't tried, you think I haven't done everything in my power to stop her? Huh?" He shot back.

He gets that she's angry and he can sense the underlining jealously from miles away; but there was no way he was going to sit back and cop this abuse. Especially from someone who didn't even notice her so called 'best friend' was in trouble.

"I've did everything I could to stop, I begged, I pleaded, hell I even threatened to tell her Dad, but she won't stop!" The desperation in his eyes was enough to show Spencer how serious he was.  
"She wouldn't stop, that's why I'm here, because I might not be able to stop her, but I can try and do something, I can drop her home, I can bandage her up, I can do something!"

And despite the desperation and sincerity of his words, as far as Spencer is concerned, there's still one thing he could've done.

"You should've called me"

"She wouldn't let me, she made me promise, and I know it sounds stupid, but she begged me, I think she just needed someone to trust her to make her own decisions." He answered, hoping desperately that she'd understand.

She didn't.

"You should've told me, or Emily, or even Hannah, you don't know her like we do Caleb, you should've told someone"

"I shouldn't have had to." His reply is short, and he turns back to the fight (which was slowly drawing to a close) without another word.

And as much as Spencer wants to retort, she can't.

Because as much as pains her to admit it, he was right.

And she's so wrapped up in her own self-deprecating thoughts that she doesn't realise the fight's over.

She doesn't notice Aria gingerly making her way through the crowd.

She doesn't notice the surprised/angry look on Aria's face.

She doesn't notice anything.

Ironically she to upset at herself for not noticing the last five weeks, to notice what's going on in front of her.

And it's not until Aria speaks that she's snapped out of her trance.

"Spencer, what the hell are you doing here?"

* * *

**Soo what did you think?**

**I know I promised Sparia in this chapter, and realize there wasn't any actual interaction, but I promise next chapter!**

**Please let me know if you have any idea's on where I could take this story, ideas are just kinda up in the air at the moment.  
**

**Oh an do you think I should write in Ezra being A, or just choose to ignore it and refuse to believe it's true like most of the PLL fans out there?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys... Sorry?  
Probably doesn't cut it does it?**

**Anyway, one of the reviews for last chapter asked me to tone down the swearing... Look I try to only use it if it's really necessary, and I don't really want to have to remove it, but if you guys a finding this too offensive let me know and I'll change it. (or maybe change the rating to M, but I think that seems a bit drastic)**

**On with story, oh and, all mistakes are mine and mine alone (And there could be few, its 2am)! **

* * *

To say Aria was surprised to see her best friend, as she was limping out of the ring would be the understatement of the year.

She honestly didn't know what to think.

She felt angry.

She betrayed.

And yet the smallest part of her felt relieved.

Because as pissed off as she was at the prospect of Spencer stopping her from fighting.

The fact that she was here meant she still cared.

And she's not sure when, but somewhere, between the fights, the secrecy and the control. She stopped believing that her friends cared.

Because as much as she wanted to keep this secret.

As much as she wanted to believe that she was fine on her own.

Part of her couldn't help but wish they had noticed.

Because she couldn't bring herself to ask for help.

But that didn't mean she didn't need it.

But there was no way in hell she was going to admit that.

Because over the last few weeks, she's been fine on her own (that's what she keeps telling herself).

So she's going to keep up that charade.

"Spencer what the hell are you doing here?"

And when she's met with nothing but silence, she turns to Caleb, because over the last few weeks she learned to trust him with her life, and she couldn't believe he'd sell her out. She refused to believe someone else so close could betray her, she had too much of that already.

"Did you tell her? Did you bring her here? I trusted you Caleb, I thought y…"

It's at this point that Spencer finally recognises Aria and the words coming out of her mouth.

"He didn't tell me Aria," The words come out hesitantly as if she's scared of Aria's response.

"Well then how are you here, cause you sure as hell didn't just stumble upon this place!" Aria shoots back.

Spencer didn't answer, she simply showed Aria the same text she'd shown Caleb mere minutes earlier.

And with that Aria turned and collapsed against the wall, the old structure of the building the only thing holding her up. The wincing not going unnoticed by her best friend.

Because somehow A hadn't managed to do it again.

Somehow they'd managed to take away the one thing she thought she had control of.

The one thing she thought was hers.

And if A could do that, then they could do anything.

And she thinks she's known that for a while.

But it's only now that it's really starting to sink in.

"Cmon Aria, let's get you home," Spencer said softly to the younger girl; putting aside all feelings of anger she currently had towards her best friend, (there would be a time and place for that confrontation). She placed her arm around cautiously around her, taking the place of the wall as Aria's main support. She turned to Caleb who was silently watching the entire scene take place. "I've got her."

And he hesitates, just for a second; because as much as he knows she's in good hands. He's been the one who's looked after her for last five weeks. And he's not sure he's ready to give that up.

"I'll look after her, I'll call you if I need anything." Spencer answers the hesitation in his eyes.

But it's not until Aria looks up and gives him a slight nod; that he reluctantly agrees.

Because if she's willing to let Spencer help her, then she might be ready to admit she needs help.

And for the first time, in what feels like a long time,

He thinks that maybe, just maybe, there might be a way out for Aria.

So he places his faith in Spencer, praying to a god he doesn't actually believe in that she won't let her down.

* * *

The car trip is silent (apart from the small winces whenever the car hits a bump). Spencer can't recall the amount of times she opened her mouth in an attempt to say something, only to close it again. What was she meant to say?

How was she possibly meant to start this conversation, she didn't even know what this conversation was about?

By the time they arrive at Spencers place, Aria is virtually asleep on the car window; and as she looks over at her friend who looks so small and innocent the overwhelming feeling of guilt returns. Because Spencer can't for the life of her figure out when everything got so fucked up.

"Hey, c'mon Aria we're here." She gently places her hand on Aria's shoulder who immediately straightens up in the car, taking in her surroundings.

"Spencer, I thought you were taking me home?" She questions with a mixture of curiosity and slight agitation.

"Seriously? You seriously thought I was going to drop you home and pretend that everything was just fine? Really?"

Aria resists the urge to reply with a snarky comment about the fact she didn't seem to care for the last few weeks, instead just replying with a simple "Whatever," as she opened the door and slowly rose to her feet.

Spencer was by her side in seconds (ignoring the snide response); and silently helping into her house and up the stairs into her room.

* * *

"What's your mum going to say?" Aria questions as the girls enter Spencer's bedroom.

"Oh I don't know, I'm sure you can just come up with some kind of lie, shouldn't be too difficult for you." Spencer shoots back, refusing to make eye contact as she carefully guides Aria to the edge of her bed.

The response leaves Aria a little speechless, but mostly just pissed off. What right did Spencer have to be angry at her?

She didn't ask for her help?

She didn't ask her for anything?

But as Spencer crouches down and begins uniting her gym shoes she realises that maybe that was the problem. Because they were supposed to be best friends; yet when she really needed someone she turned to Caleb.

And Aria realises now as she sees the unshed tears in her friend's eyes, how much that must have hurt her. Because Aria knows how that feels, the feeling of being looked over; the feeling of you're not good enough; the feeling of finding out your best friend has been keeping secrets from you.

But she didn't mean it like that.

It wasn't like that.

"Listen Spencer I…" But she's cut off before she can even begin her explanation.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Spencer questions desperately as she removes Aria's left shoe to reveal the beginnings of what appears to be a pretty serious swollen ankle. "Seriously Aria, what the hell were thinking, how could you possibly think this is good idea, what possessed you to think _'hey you know what might be fun, getting in a boxing ring with dudes twice my size and getting the crap beaten out me'_?"

"Hey, I won tonight!" Aria interjects in an attempt to soften her friend's frightened and angry expression. (It didn't work)

"Aria what the hell is wrong with you?" Spencers asks loudly "This isn't funny, none of this is funny, aren't our lives fucked up enough without you trying to kill yourself?"

"That's not what I was doing!" Aria shoots back, because she may not have had any idea what was going through her mind, she knows she's not suicidal, that much she's sure of.

"Then what were you doing? Please! For the love of god explain it to me?" And Spencer's question isn't accusing or aggressive, it was desperate curiosity. Because she needed to know, she needed know why her best friend was resorting to such drastic measures, she need to know why.

"I just… "Aria looks into her best friends' eyes which are swimming in desperation, pleading with her to explain. And with that look, the first of the many walls which she'd spent the last few weeks building up around herself, comes crashing down.

Because this is Spencer.

Her best friend,

The other half of team 'Sparia'.

And she's always been there for her, it's just taken Aria this long to realise.

And she deserved some sort of an explanation (even if Aria couldn't quite explain it to herself just yet).

She owed her at least that much.

"I can't do this anymore, '_A_' is everywhere, they know everything, they have control over every fucking thing in my life! I just… I just needed something that A couldn't control, that they couldn't take away from me, something that I was in charge of! And as stupid as it sounds; out there it's just me and whoever is in the ring with me. Me versus them, and I can see them, and hear them and I know what their intentions are, and there's none of this other bullshit that goes with it. I'm in charge, and I know I can't control what the other person does, but I can control myself, and I can defend myself. For twenty fucking minutes of my life I'm in control."

By the time Aria finishes her rant tears are threatening to spill from her eyes, but she refuses to let them fall. She turns and looks at her best friend who is now sitting beside her on the bed.

"You don't understand do you?"

"I do." Spencer answers back honestly, "But that doesn't mean for a second I condone what you're doing." She looks down to see the smaller girl practically falling asleep on her.

"Alright c'mon let's get that shirt off" And if it wasn't for the seriousness of the situation Spencer would've laughed at how quickly the younger girls eye's shot opened.

"Excuse me?"

"Look Aria, right now I have so many different emotions running through my head I can't even think straight, and I can only imagine how you feel. So let's just get this over with and get to bed."

"What over with?"

"Look I don't know how the rest of the fights went, but I know that bloke tonight teed off on your ribcage like he was kicking a field goal, so c'mon, off with the shirt!"

Aria sighed reluctantly, and slowly (and painfully), pulled the tank top over her head, feeling extremely exposed, as she sat on the bed in nothing but short shorts, and a sports bra.

"Stand up." Spencer ordered, trying to keep her emotions at bay as she examined her friends' discoloured torso. "Shit Aria!" She exclaimed as she lightly traced her fingers over the bruising.

"Not tonight Spence, please?" Aria sighed in an exhausted voice, as she saw the emotions begin to build up on her friends' face again.

"Does it hurt to breathe in?" Spencer questioned.

"No more than it does at any other time."

"No sharp pains or anything like that"

Aria just shook her head.

"Alright, um, I don't think anything is seriously broken, not that I'm a doctor, maybe a cracked rib or 4 but there's nothing we can really do for that anyway, anything else troubling you?" Spencer asked, trying not to let her emotions bubble over.

Aria just smiled slightly and went to Spencer's closest to find some old clothes to sleep in, "Ask me in the morning."

Spencer just sighed, "You know where the towels are?"

Aria nodded and headed to the bathroom. Leaving Spencer to her thoughts, thoughts that she couldn't for the life of her process.

She had so many emotions running through her head she couldn't tell which way was up anymore.

She felt guilty.

She was confused.

She was overwhelmed.

And she was just so angry.

She wanted to apologise to Aria, tell her she was so sorry for not helping her sooner; yet at the time she wanted to scream at her for being so selfish.

Her thoughts were interrupted as the tiny brunette limped back into the room, Spencers' clothes hanging off her small body. Her damp hair was in a messy ponytail, the bags under eyes were distinctive, the knuckles on her right hand, swollen, bruising was beginning to form on her face, and she looked absolutely exhausted.

And as Spencer took sight of the young girl; all she really wanted to do that night was hold her and never let go. The rest could wait until morning.

So she offered a sad smile as she rolled over to the other side of the bed. Allowing Aria to slowly slide under the covers, before she gently wrapped her arm around the younger girl.

And yes, Spencer knew they still had a way to go.

A very long way.

But she finally had her best friend, safely back in her arms'

And she was never letting go again.

* * *

**Okay so I'm considering leaving the story here? Everyone's kinda happy right?**  
**Or should I keep going and bring in Emily and Hannah?**  
**Let me know what you guys think!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey guys, I'm trying to get the chapters up quicker.**

**Thank you for the reviews! They mean the world.**

**Big shout out to _MagicinMe123,_ If you haven't read her stuff, go do it right now!**  
**Anyway thanks so much for the encouragement and advice, you're awesome!**

**So on with the story, All mistakes are mine!**

* * *

When Spencer awoke the next morning, the first thing that crossed her mind, was the fact that she hadn't finished her homework for the days' classes. It took her a solid 10 seconds to realise that it was in fact a Saturday; and another minute for the previous night's events to come rushing back to her.

It was then that she turned her head to see her best friend lying fast asleep next to her.

And as she looked at the peaceful look on her face, all she wanted to do was wrap her up in the blanket and never let her leave.

Because here, she was safe.

Here, Spencer could protect her.

Protect her from the world,

From A.

From herself.

And she knows that Aria is grown a woman, she knows that she can look after herself.

But as the smaller girl tosses slightly, turning her head to reveal a newly formed bruise running along her jawline.

She starts to doubt that.

Because if she could actually look after herself, then she wouldn't be here.

If she was grown up enough to make mature decisions, then she wouldn't have decided that getting the crap beaten out of her was a good form of venting.

And that's what Spencer just can't figure out.

Because Aria's has always been the mature one;

The responsible one.

The voice of reason.

She wasn't reckless;

That was a role left for Hannah, or Emily, hell maybe even Spencer herself.

But never Aria.

And that's why Spencer just doesn't understand.

Because this wasn't Aria.

When Aria was upset she'd talk to someone, to Ezra, to her Mom, or her friends.

And it's only as she analyses this in her head that Spencer starts to put some of it together. Because her Mom's on a different continent, and Ezra is nothing but another teacher in the hallway.

And her friends; well, Spencer's still not sure when Aria decided she couldn't talk to them anymore.

But she knows she's going to change her friends' perception.

She has to.

But she can't do it on her own, it's clear there's been too much of that already.

* * *

The fact that it's only 8am doesn't occur to her until she hears the groggy voice that answers Emily's phone.

"Hello?"

"Emily?"

"Nope, who's this?" Paige's frustrated and rather pissed of voice registers in Spencer's ear.

"Shit Paige, sorry, I didn't realise how early it was, it's been a pretty rough night" Spencer sighs into her phone as she runs a hand over face.

"Is everything alright?" Paige asks quickly, all signs on weariness gone from her voice, and replaced with nothing but concern.

"Yeah… No… Kind of, listen I'm sorry but is Emily there? I just, I really need to talk to her?"

"Umm yeah sure, I'll just grab her." Spencer pretends not to hear the slightly offended tone in Paige's voice, knowing how much Emily's girlfriend has worked to be a part of their circle.

"Thanks."

It takes another 30 seconds for Emily to finally come to phone, and if it wasn't for the circumstances Spencer would've laughed at the muffled sounds of Paige trying to wake her girlfriend.

"Hello?"

"Hey Em."

"Spence, what's wrong?" Emily cuts straight to the point, knowing there'd have to be a pretty good reason for her friend to be calling her so early.

"Umm…" And it's only now that Spencer realises she has absolutely no idea what to say, because how on earth does she begin to explain what went down last night.

"Spence?"

"It's… It's a long story, I um… I figured out what's going on with Aria, well kind of, I don't actually know what's going on with her, but I know what she's been doing an.." Spencer's relieved when Emily cuts her off, because she honestly has no idea where that sentence was going.

"Spencer, slow down, is Aria okay?" Emily asks desperately, ignoring Paige's concerned glances.

"Yes... No… Not really, look she's at my house, she's safe…" Spencer reassured her "…But um… she's not okay"

And as Spencer finally forces those words out, she realises she's finally admitted what she's been trying to deny since she got that text.

Because there's something wrong with her best friend.

Aria's not okay.

And it's taken Spencer this long to actually accept that. (If only she could get Aria to do the same)

"I'll be over as soon as possible okay?" Emily asks, though it comes out as a statement, because she wasn't asking.

"Thanks Em, see you soon"

"Look after her Spence."

Spencer takes a glance back into her room before replying, "Always."

As she hangs up the phone, she sighs as she leans against the door frame, the one thing running through her mind at that point was the fact that she didn't want to have that conversation with Hannah.

And as she glances down at her phone she realises that she doesn't have to.

Because as jealous as she was of Caleb, she knew he'd do anything for them (especially Hannah, and as of recently, Aria).

And right now Aria needed her friends.

And Hannah needed to be there.

And he could do that.

So she sent him a quick text message (ignoring the fact the she was probably putting him in an awkward position)

_Hey can you get Hannah to come over when she's up._

She left it vague, figuring he was probably smart enough to fill in the blanks. Besides apparently he knew more than she did anyway.

She shook the jealous thoughts from her head, as she went to wake Aria. Figuring she should at least try to prepare the girl for the bombardment of concern and questions she was about to face.

* * *

To say Spencer surprised her when she placed her hand on Aria's shoulder jostling her awake, wouldn't be entirely accurate. It wasn't so much the fact that Spencer had woken her, it was the fact that she'd actually fallen asleep in the first place.

Because over the last few weeks sleep has been one of the many things that seemed to allude her.

But last night she slept better then she has in a long time.

Yet she refuses to believe it's because she was next to her best friend.

Because she doesn't need anyone.

She's fine on her own.

That's what she keeps telling herself.

"Hey Aria," Spencer says hesitantly, not entirely sure how the conversation would go.

"Morning," The reply was relatively neutral, as Aria rubbed her hands over face, stifling a yawn. She winced slightly as she sat up in the bed swinging her legs over the side.

"How are you feeling this morning?" Spencer asks, concern written all over her face.

"Seriously Spence it's not that bad, I swear," Aria insisted as she made to stand up only to fall back on the bed when she noticed her swollen ankle wasn't prepared to support her weight.

"Not that bad?" Spencer questioned incredulously as she moved to help her, "You can't even stand up, and you're saying it's not that bad? Are you ser…"

"Spence I'm fine okay? I just forgot about my ankle for a sec," Aria cut her off, making a second attempt to stand up (this time succeeding in staying upright). "See? I'm fine."

"Oh yeah perfectly fine! You can stand up, and on only your second attempt!" Spencer voice was angry and laced with sarcasm, "You know what comes after that right? You actually have to walk, you think you can do that to?"

"What the hell is your problem?" Aria shoots back, anger creeping into her own voice.

"Me? I'm not the one with the problem here Aria, I'm not the one who got the crap beaten of her last night!" Spencer shoots, back as the inevitable emotions start to boil over.

"For god sake Spencer, it's not that big of a deal."

"Not a big a deal, seriously? You seriously don't…" Spencer cuts herself off before she says something she can't take back, sighing exasperation. Because judging by the look on Aria's face, this conversation was already heading in the complete wrong direction, and she knew that agitating Aria now, would only result in another fight.  
"Look, Emily and Hannah are coming over, do you want to go downstairs and get breakfast?" She asks, attempting to put an end to their building argument.

"You called them?"

"Of course I called them! Unlike you I don't lie to my best friends!"

"What the hell are you on about? I didn't lie to anyone!"

"Right, you just refused to tell us about all this, that's so much better!" Spencer can feel the tension building up again, but she can't help herself.

"This? This is nothing, this is none of your business!" Aria shoots back, confused as why Spencer is so concerned, so anxious.

Before Spencer can respond she's cut off by the doorbell, she turns and looks downstairs before turning back to Aria, sighing again.  
"Do you need a hand to get downstairs?" She asked in resigned tone, secretly already knowing the answer.

"I'm fine" Aria answers quietly, refusing to make eye-contact.

"Of course you are," Spencer mutters, as she turns to make her way downstairs. She stops at her door before turning around, and walking back to Aria, grabbing her face softly in her hands; forcing the younger girl to look her in the eyes.

"Aria this," She says nodding at her bruised face, "this isn't nothing okay? And when you're in trouble, then damn right it's my business, you're my best friend, we're team Sparia."

The tears begin to build up in Aria eyes as Spencer's words hit there mark; but the moment is cut short by the doorbell ringing again.

Spencer sighs as she releases Aria's face, "I better get that, meet you down there?"

Aria just nods, wiping her eyes.

"I know you think you don't need anyone, but I'm here anyway, and I'm not going anywhere," Spencer says softly as she walks to the door, turning back one last time, "it's going to be okay Aria."

And for the first time, in a long time,

Aria thinks she might actually believe that.

* * *

**So your reviews of last chapter are what made me write this one so thanks!**

**I tried to include a bit more Sparia, not sure if it was corny or not...**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey guys, I'm back!**

**Have you read all the spoilers for the season '4B' I'm really keen for Aria to have a really exciting story line, or just a story line...**

**Thanks so much for the support for the last chapter.**

**Shout out to my reviewers you guys are amazing!**  
_IvannaB, Forever Courage, Lala-Pll-Time, Tascar19, TeamSpariaFTW, Sgdp1261_

* * *

Emily doesn't think she's ever moved so fast in her life.

From the time Paige handed her the phone to the time she's knocking on Spencer's door, a grand total of less than 20 minutes has past.

She ignored her girlfriends concerned questioning and worried gaze as she rushed to get ready.

Because Spencer was worried,

She didn't know what to do.

And Emily knew from past experience that when Spencer is at a loss, then they're in serious trouble.

Because she always had a handle on everything, especially when it came to Aria.

Although as she looks back over it she realises that Aria usually seemed pretty in control of everything anyway.

But maybe that façade was the problem.

Because over the last few weeks, there was obviously something going on with her shorter friend.

But she just assumed that Aria had it under control (the way she always did).

And that made everything so much easier to deal with.

Because that was one less person in her life that Emily had to worry about.

Aria was the one friend who she didn't have to worry about running off and doing something stupid.

Aria was the one person who could she could rely on to look after herself.

And she hates how selfish that sounds in her head, but it's true.

Or at least she thought it was.

But Spencer's stressed out voice, early on a Saturday morning is clear evidence to contrary.

So she rushes downstairs, unaware of the fact that her girlfriend is hot on her heels.

Because the term '_Aria's not okay'_ could mean fucking anything.

And for some reason the fact that she's '_safe_' and Spencers' house does little to quell the worry that's building up inside her.

Because over the last four years, the word _safe_, has grown to mean exactly nothing.

So she lets Paige guide her into the passenger seat of her car, before her girlfriend jumps in the driver's side and starts speeding down the road towards Spencers'.

And Emily is momentarily distracted by whether or not she should have asked her to stay at home, but dismisses the thought rather quickly, (she can deal with that later).

Right now she needs to get to Aria.

Because she needs help.

Apparently she has for a while now.

But Emily just got so used to not having to worry about her.

So used to the one bit of consistency she could rely on.

So used to Aria being their rock.

That she didn't notice when she started to crack, none of them did.

So she's going to be there now,

Like she should have been from the start.

Because Aria has always been there when she needed her (even sometimes when she didn't).

So she's going to return the favour,

She owes her at least that much.

* * *

Spencer hadn't even opened the door fully before Emily burst through (Paige waiting politely outside until she's invited in)

"Where is she?"

"Upstairs, she's coming down in a minute," Spencer sighs as she leads the girls towards the kitchen.

"What the hell is going on Spencer?" Emily demanded.

"I don't really know…" Spencer replied, not entirely sure on how or where to start explaining.

"Cut the crap Spence, just tell me!"

"Have you ever seen the movie 'Fight club'?" Spencer asked hesitantly with a slight smile, only to realise that Emily was too far out of the loop to get how the reference was actually relevant.

"What the fuck has that got to do with anything?" Emily yelled back in frustration.

"Em…" Paige warned, as she placed a hand on her girlfriends shoulder. Emily sighed a little before shaking out of her girlfriends grasp and turning to look back at Spencer in desperation. "Spencer, please,"

Spencer rubbed the back of her head, sitting down on the kitchen stool before she began to explain everything that had happened, starting with the message.

As Spencer drew the story to a close, Emily had begun to pace the kitchen.

"I don't get it," Emily stated shaking her head

"Yeah, join the club," Spencer scoffed back.

"So what, she's taken up boxing?"

"Oh no, boxing involves protective gear, and gloves, and opponents your size" Spencer answers, "She's taken up, getting into a fight with guys twice her size, with no protection, and getting the crap beaten out of her!"

"Oh for god sakes Spencer it's not that bad!" Aria cuts in as she finally makes her way to the kitchen, "You seem to be missing the fact that I actually won last night."

"No Aria you seem to be missing the fact that I don't actually give a shit whether or not you won last night," Spencer shoots back.

"Touché" Aria mutters slightly under her breath as she limps towards one of the vacant kitchen stool, only to be intercepted by Emily.

"Jesus Christ Aria!" She said as she examined the bruises littering her jawline and spreading up to her eye socket.

"Oh that's nothing you should see the rest of her!" Spencer chimes in, her built up anger coming out again.

"Thanks Spencer," Aria shoots back, sending her a death glare.

_If looks could kill_, Spencer thought, before answering Aria's gaze with a sarcastic smile of her own.

"Show me," Emily demands simply.

"Excuse me?" Aria questions raising her eyebrows slightly.

"Lift up your shirt"

"Whoa, Emily your girlfriend is right there." Aria answers with a slight smile, trying to ease the tension in the room (also trying to change the subject).

Her attempted humour was met with nothing but stern glances, (expect Paige who offered her am awkward smile).

"Seriously Em, I'm fine," She insisted as she placed her hand reassuringly on Emily's shoulder.

"Great, if you're fine, then just show me." Emily shot back, not letting it go.

Before Aria can respond, they're interrupted by Ms Hastings walking down the stairs. Dressed and ready for work (apparently weekends don't apply to lawyers).

"Oh, Good morning girls!" She said in surprise at seeing them all in her kitchen, "What are you all doing here so early?" The question was directed at Spencer, but it was Paige who thought up the answer.

"We were just going to go for a run, trying to get it in early, so we can have the rest of the weekend" Paige answers as the other three smile at Spencers' mum (Emily and Spencer smile, Aria looks down trying to hide her face).

Ms Hastings seems to buy the excuse until she looks at Aria, "You're going for a run Aria?" She questions, doubt lining her words.

Despite the tension in the room the other three girls can't help but laugh at Aria's slightly insulted expression; apparently it was common knowledge that the smaller girl wasn't exactly the athletic type. Although recent events could prove otherwise.

"Oh no, I was going to stay here, and support them from a distance," Aria answers with a smile as she turned to look at Spencer's mother.

"Oh good lord dear, what happened to your face?" She questioned in concern as she approached the smaller girl to get a closer look.

"Oh, nothing" Aria dismisses as she turned away, before answering the question, "Apparently you can't actually walk through glass doors, no matter how see through they look" The lie rolls of her tongue so easily, it surprises even herself.

If it wasn't for the look on the other girls face's Ms Hastings would've bought the lie, and not given it a second thought. But the girls couldn't hide the concerned glances. No matter how hard they tried.

She smiled at Aria shaking her head slightly, "Alright well you girls be careful, and do look after yourself Aria" She said pointedly as she left the room, "See you later tonight."

"Bye Mom,"

"Bye Ms Hastings"

The girls all sighed in relief as she left the house, and Spencer went back to making the coffee.

It was Paige who noticed the way Aria was struggling to stay on her feet, all her weight on one leg, and she was gingerly holding ribs. Paige moved around to other side of the bench, pulling the stool out, before grabbing Aria's hand and guiding her to the chair. Not giving her a chance to decline the offer.

Emily looked up as she saw Aria wince when Paige guided her to the chair.

"Are you all right Aria?" She questioned in concern.

"Yeah I'm fi…"

"I swear to god Aria if you end that sentence with the word fine, I'm gonna throw this coffee at you!" Spencer finally snaps, slamming the coffee down on the table as Aria tries to dismiss Emily's concern.

"Seriously Spencer it's just a couple of bruises what's the big deal?" Aria yells as she goes to stand up.

"The big deal? Aria the big deal is the fact, that you seem hell bent on getting yourself hurt, maybe even killed, and you can't see the problem with that! The big deal is the fact that you think this is an okay way of dealing with everything!" Spencer yells at her as all the emotions she's been bottle up over the last night come pouring out, she sighs slightly before lowering her voice,  
"Aria the big deal is the fact that you felt so lost and so alone, that you had to resort to this; the big deal, is the fact you didn't think you could come to me, to any of us.

"Spence…" Aria tried to cut her off, but Spencer just continued to look at her, with nothing but desperation in her eyes.

"Aria the big deal is the fact that this has been going on for weeks, and none of us noticed…" She blinked back tears as she stepped towards Aria, "…and all those weeks ago, when you were sitting in the gutter at some ridiculous hour of the night, because you were literally too injured to drive; you called Caleb, instead of us."

Emily looked up, with hurt in her eyes at this part.

"Spencer pleas…"

"Aria the big deal is that you've starting doing something that is fucking stupid, and unbelievably dangerous, because sometime over the last few months, you obviously stopped trusting us."

"Spencer that's not true," Aria insisted as she moved towards her friend. The emotions boiling over, because out of all the concerns that ran through Aria's head when she started doing all this.

This reaction from Spencer and her friends, was certainly not something she was worried about.

"Then what is it Aria? Why are you doing this? Why can't you talk to us?" Spencer begged as she grabbed her friend's hand.

"I just…" But before Aria could begin to answer Spencer question, they were both cut off by the Hastings front door swinging open.

"Aria, what the hell is your problem?" Hannah demanded as she burst through the front door, Caleb close behind her.

And as everyone stood in awkward silence, starring at the addition to the room;

One thought went through Aria's mind.

_Sorry Caleb._

* * *

**So keen for Hannah to get involved?**

**I'm trying to involve Paige and Caleb as much as possible, and don't stress, I have plans for Toby to get involved as well.**

**Oh and Sparia friendship or relationship?**

**Please let me know what you think, and if you've got any ideas :)**


End file.
